irwin:
i’ll be pulling into your area about the same time as this package. and though you may not see me, i’ll be staying close, and doing all i can to get you home, from now until the day you ARE home. meanwhile, here’s the skinny on a pitch i threw in your honor last night. it was stupid, of course. there will be consequences of course. but like you i believe there is a time for crazy gestures. this WP stands for “war prayer.” god bless you, and god bless your tube of gleem. see you soon.

love,
papa

p.s. to major keys. i know you’ll intercept this, and i doubt you’ll show it to him. but i’ll be there soon enough, with plenty more copies. you’ve got two crazies on your hands now, major. and more where we two came from.

(i’m still weeping.)